Hey Girl - Don't Listen To The World
I was scrolling through social media, like I do every morning, and something inconspicuous caught my eye.
It wasn’t the blonde on the beach rocking her killer bod.
It wasn’t the perfectly curated baby announcement.
And it wasn’t the blogger sharing her #OOTD
It was an article titled How To Stay True To Yourself When The World Wants You To Change.
Something about those words mushed together to formulate that sentence paralyzed my fingers from continuing to scroll. I sat there, gazing off into the distance thinking about what that headline was insinuating.
When the world wants you to change.
There are 7.7 billion people in the world and someone, or maybe multiple of them, want you to change.
I was still in my trance when I started thinking, does the world want ME to change?
What would they want to change about me?
Oh God, I know what it would be.
Yup, it would be that and absolutely that too.
My insecurities started flooding in faster than a Bachelor contestants social media following.
After I calmed myself and silenced the voices in my head, I reached for my laptop and opened a new Word document as quickly as I could. I didn’t even read the article before I started throwing my own words onto a piece of virtual paper.
As much as we like to admit that we do things for ourselves, I can’t help but think that sometimes, we may be doing something for someone else. I’m not referring to the hold the door for a stranger something else, rather the oh let me do that or wear that because it’s what they would want.
This may be a mental tactic to protect my own self but I like to think that even the most confident people feel the pressure on their shoulders to change. I know I sure as shit do. Do you?
For those days where your insecurities to change are barking in your head louder than your neighbors annoying yapping poodle, take a breath and give the below tactics a try.
BRB Social Media
Some days, social media can feel like your BFF that will never let you down while other days it can be the devil on your shoulder that you can’t shake. While social media platforms are meant to connect us in a positive manner, it can also serve as a dose of what you don’t have / what you aren’t. Trust me girl, I’ve been sucked into the black hole of social media comparison more times than I would like to admit and it’s an unforgiving place to spend your time and energy. In effort to find your own voice and form your own opinions, take a break from scrolling. Treat yourself to the gift of unplugging from those on the other side of a screen. ,Put your phone down and give yourself the opportunity to be present with those physically around you and the time to get to know yourself, without the internal chatter.
Who Are You
No really, who are you? What are your beliefs? What do you value? Who do you want to associate yourself with? What is your style? What will you stand for? What won’t you stand for?
The more in tuned you are with yourself, the less fragile you will be when people are breathing their own values, etc. down your neck.
Stand by your opinions.
Dress the way you want.
Believe in what you believe in.
Style your hair the way you feel best.
Love the people who your heart beats for.
In the words of a smart man, “if you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.”
Don’t fall for putting yourself into someone else’s box. Create your own box and live your best life, inside or outside, of that box.
Validation has hit our generation like the plague. A quick double tap gets more panties wet these days then real life experiences.
A moment of silence for our grandparents who just rolled over in their graves.
If you open your eyes every morning with the intention to have all of those around you approve of you, you will fail. You will fail, every single time. Why? Well, in case you haven’t heard; you can be the ripest peach in the whole world, but there will always be someone who hates peaches. You’ll be too skinny, too fat, too pretty, too ugly, too smart, too stupid, too this, too that. You will never win the validation game so why even make yourself a player? Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love you.
I know, do you may be the most cliché thing I could write at this point of the article but IT’S THE TRUTH. Do what makes you happy. Do what makes you feel most alive. Do what makes you feel successful, healthy, and badass. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and in turn your kindness to others will be second nature. Above all else, just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, weird, beautiful and magical person you are and the rest will take care of itself.