From Miss to Mrs.
Well my friends, here we are! Welcome to The Millennial Miss Wedding series. I’ll do my best to take you guys with us through each and every step of planning our special day. I’ll be sharing advice, logistics and emotions as I head down the road of becoming The Millennial Mrs.
Before we dive in, I want to squash some speculations. I will not be changing The Millennial Miss brand to The Millennial Mrs. Why? Because to me, The Millennial Miss is a community and I don’t want that title defined by my personal relationship status. Whether you are single AF, dating, engaged or married AF at one point in your life you were a ‘millennial miss’ and that part of life has shaped you to who you are now and who you are becoming so, The Millennial MISS isn’t going anywhere, ok?
Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get to it.
1. I am not a wedding planner.
2. I am not a wedding expert.
3. I may or may not be emotionally stable enough to write these posts.
4. Any of your questions / suggestions are welcomed.
OK FOR REAL LET’S DO THIS.
If you are a new reader and have no idea who I am or who I’m engaged to then let’s recap for a second. I’m Chelsea Briche, a 27 year old boss babe who is the face behind The Millennial Miss (the website you are currently on) I am engaged to a hunk of a man who has a heart of gold, Robby Scott. For our full relationship story + deets on how he proposed check this outttt.
Ya’ll when I tell you that I had NO idea that Robby was about to propose, I ain’t lying. When daydreaming about our engagement I was convinced that I would have an “AH HA IT’S ABOUT TO HAPPEN” moment but nope, nada, nothing.
Being proposed to is a time in life that no matter how hard you try you will never be able to fully convey your emotions. Before I could soak in the fact that I had a diamond ring on my finger the flood of presents, magazines, and congratulatory text messages poured in. As I flipped through each “material” I almost passed out when realizing how much goes into planning a wedding and the expense of it all. With every page turned I noticed a prominent theme; there is nothing in the magazines or wedding inspo Instagram accounts that talks about the emotional side of all of this. There I was being a ball of emotions feeling like I was the craziest bride to be for simultaneously crying and smiling. So, let’s make something very clear….
YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
If you’re feeling like you just a bought a house in emotional ville population: 1, I swear to the Lord above, you’re not the only one. What I can tell you is to make it a priority to feel all the emotions that are swimming around in your heart. You are about to embark on a whole new life chapter so before you take another step forward know that your feelings, opinion and relationship with yourself should always remain on the priority list.
The best advice I’ve received so far is to never forget the we in wedding. I’ve heard stories of and seen with my own eyes couples that are so damn wrapped up in the IDEA of having a picture perfect wedding and booking this band and wearing that designer dress that they lose sight of each other in the entire process.
F*ck that. Call me crazy but the whole premise of getting married is because your love for someone is so deep it trumps everything else, including what your center pieces look like. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s completely normal to want your wedding day to be a vision of detailed perfection. As long as you don’t forget the reason behind all the chaotic planning you’re in the right mind space.
Ok, taking my advice hat off and going to catch you up to speed on where we are in our planning process.
I know everyone says “enjoy being engaged” and I totally agree with that but due to Robby’s baseball schedule, we had to put the pedal to the floor a bit if we wanted to tie the knot this off season. To be honest, our venue search started about a week after the engagement (don’t judge us). We narrowed it down to our top 3 places that we felt would best fit our vibe. Myself along with mine and Robby’s parents dedicated an entire day to venue appointments. Robby was in spring training at this time so unfortunately he wasn’t able to come with us but my 1049 pictures and 978 videos made him feel like he didn’t miss a thing ;) After taking a walk through of a particular venue it was a no brainer that it was the perfect place for us to have our special day. So, check that off the list and cue a small sigh of relief.
Top venue planning tops:
1. This may sound totally obvious but check the fit. Make sure the room is large enough to accommodate not only your guest list but the tables, chairs, aka anything that takes up space.
2. We did not go this route however if you are looking to book your reception in a hotel or country club setting make sure to ask for membership and or special rates. Trust me, any dollar saved will be add up quickly.
3. If you are going the unconventional venue route like us then be prepared to work out more details since you will most likely be using outside vendors
4. Think about your color scheme and overall theme when walking through a venue. If a space that you’re looking at has walls that will clash with your entire vibe then you should quickly X that option out
5. If your dream is to be married outside then have a plan b in case the worst happens and you need to weather the storm
6. When looking into different venues something that I realized is how privacy varies from place to place. If that is something important to you then confirm with the venue how many other events may be held at the same time.
Let’s expand a bit on point number 1 above: guest list or as I like to refer to is as, the most cut throat part of this entire process. I’ve only been engaged for about 2 months but what I’ve learned to be true is that no matter how hard you try, you will not be able please everyone. In fact, you’ll probably piss someone off but that’s just a part of life. The silver lining? THIS IS YOUR WEDDING DAY. This day is about you and your significant other. That’s it. So, don’t worry about your dads business associate that you met once when you were 15 years old or the friend that you haven’t talk to in over a year - you cannot add their hurt feelings to your shoulders. Capiche? When you sit down to draft your list(s) think of this: who are the ones that you could absolutely not envision your day without?
Here are some tips that were helpful when Robby and I drafted our guest list:
1. We went with the tale as old at time tip of creating a “in a perfect world we would have all of these people at our wedding” and then from there we begin to split the list.
2. Our criteria quite possibly may be different then yours so however you and your fiancé decide to make “cuts” do it that way. Things to think about: coworkers, plus ones, kids oh and your budget.
3. More guest on the list means more money that is coming out your bank account. I would suggest keeping your budget written on a piece of paper in front of your face when creating your list.
4. This may not work for every couple so be cautious with this but Robby and I did not ask our parents for “their” list. He and I sat down, made a list, and then sent it to our families and that was that. This is a point in the process where a slippery slope can occur if one set of parent’s financial contribution is higher so be prepared to set and stick to boundaries that you and yours previously set.
Alright guys, let’s take a break and soak all that in. I told you there was a lot going on! Next weeks agenda will cover how to shop for the perfect wedding dress and creative ways to ask your bridesmaids to be a part of your day. Sound like a plan?
Until then, love to you all.